Computer Thief ... Or, Why It's Helpful to Have Lots of Browsers

[We interrupt this broadcast to tell you about this awesomeness in a jar: Trader Joe's Lemon Curd. Put it on toast and enjoy with a cup of Tea. Earl Grey. Hot. Or drizzle over plain yogurt, then toss in some sliced almonds and dried cranberries. Better yet, put it on top of ice cream. Trust me, you'll be glad you spent the $3.99, and I'm not even getting paid to tell you that.] 

Look at me. The post hasn't even started and I'm already digressing.

If you've been paying attention, you've noticed that I'm somewhat addicted to having lots of internet browser tabs open. As a visual processor, it's just how I function, okay? I know that the browser tab's inherent "to do" item is completed when the tab is closed. Until then, it stays open. Deal with it.

So, some days the top of my browser may or may not look like this:

[Pay no attention to the fact that my arrow via Microsoft Paint is horrendous. I know that. If you'd like to get me a subscription to Adobe InDesign, then I'll make pretty graphics for you. Until then, you get the cheap stuff. Or you can pretend that Little Guy was helping me with the illustrations. :D]

[Also, you know you're married to a nerd when ... you see the Lifehacker tweet and exclaim to your husband, "You can randomize your MAC address?!?!" ... because you actually know what a MAC address is and some of what it's used for ... ]

But telling Mr. Dude that I need all those tabs open to work on my projects just makes him shake his head and sigh. It also makes him require that any machine we purchase for me needs to have as much RAM as possible. [I haven't maxed out the 12G of RAM on his super computer yet ... perhaps that should be a personal goal for the summer ... ]

Anyways, whenever he needs to use my computer, he's just learned to open a new browser. Not a new window for whatever browser I had open - no, a new browser entirely.

What?

You're surprised that we'd have Google Chrome and Mozilla Firefox and Internet Explorer all on one machine?

You must not know us very well.

So while Chrome chugged along with my 46 [!] and counting tabs, Mr. Dude pulled up Firefox to start Pandora since we had friends coming over for the evening.

As I was shutting down the computer for the night [and this is where I thank whoever had the brilliant idea to make browsers capable of resuming where you left off when you turn your machine back on again - hurray for saving all the tabs!], I noticed this video was the other tab he had opened up:

Surprising? Not in the least. It's one of his favorite franchises, all kinds of previews are coming out for games with E3 going on, and he's easily distracted. So of course he was watching that while pulling up Pandora.  

I right-clicked on the video to get the link so I could share it with all of you, and I started giggling. Bonus points if you see it in under 10 seconds: 

Did you get it? Oh, c'mon!

"Stats for Nerds". 

REALLY?!?!

I have no idea what stats it pulls up - I was laughing too hard to bother looking. And I have no idea if that's a standard option on the right-click menu, if that's special to Chrome, or if Mr. Dude was messing with my machine again.

To be honest? It's getting hard to tell anymore.

In the meantime, I'm off to enjoy my toast and lemon curd with Tea. Earl Grey. Hot. while the Little Guy sleeps. And who knows? Perhaps I'll get enough done so there are only 30 Chrome tabs open at the end of the day.

Hey, it could happen!

Xbox One vs. PS4 ... GO!

Mr. Dude used to have a collection of consoles.

When we got married, he had an original Xbox and a PS2.

Then came an Xbox 360.

Then, somehow, he weasled his way in to buying a PS3.

Mr. Dude: But, Stephanie, we need a BluRay player. The 360 doesn't have one.

Me: And why should I care about that?

Mr. Dude: Because this:

[Image via Amazon.com]

Mr. Dude: And because it's available on Amazon Prime. 

Me: Ooooooohhhhhh ... well that's different. Fine. Get the PS4. BUT! New rule. For every console you purchase, you must get rid of one from here on out. And, there must be some benefit to me, as well.

Mr. Dude: DONE!  

[BluRay comes in handy for all sorts of things like the LOTR Extended Edition Trilogy, the bonus features for Enchanted that aren't available on the DVD, Pride and Prejudice with Jennifer Ehle and Colin Firth ... you know - the important stuff.]

Then sometime this year ... last year? ... [the timeline is foggy because we have so many discussions about what gadget he's going to buy next and why] ... he started musing on whether to get an Xbox One [which was confusing, because that's what we had been calling the original Xbox over here] or a PS4. Fortunately for him, he had already sold off the PS3 in favor of playing BluRays via his computer, so there was "room" for another console.

Want to see that conversation played out in real life? Here, we took video:

Okay, so really that's Sheldon and Amy from The Big Bang Theory. But you get the point.

I think I've mentioned before how it seems that the writers must just follow my life story for materials because I've had so many of the exact conversations that go on in that show.

It's getting kinda creepy, Chuck Lorre ...

Thankfully, we've put off buying anymore consoles for the time being. Mr. Dude believes that the consoles must be advanced enough technologically beyond the last generation to justify the price, so we're safe.

For at least the next five minutes.

Until he actually makes up his mind.

On The Surface

The Microsoft Surface, that is.

Yesterday was a two-fer day for blog posts.

I kinda felt bad about leaving you in the dark on all the funny things that happened over the last week, so you got an extra one. Part of my radio silence was from giving our poor sick Little Guy lots of extra attention.

And part of it was because of conversations like this:

Yes, I know how to tell when my display driver crashed. I know what a display driver is. And I know how to update them.

I also know that if my GPU is becoming akin to burnt toast, then I have to replace the entire laptop sooner rather than later [the one upside of a desktop, in my opinion - your GPU isn't soldered onto the motherboard ... wait, did I really just type those words?!].

I'm also too lazy to do my own computer maintenance sometimes.

Besides, why deprive Mr. Dude of some time to tinker around, à la car mechanic?

So in the meantime, I'm dealing with a slightly cantankerous machine that thinks it's getting too old for the likes of 30 internet browser tabs being open at once, despite the fact that this multi-tasking mama needs it to keep chugging along.

And then Mr. Dude brought home a Microsoft Surface that a friend had let him borrow.

I think my little HP notebook could tell that I was oohing and aahing over another machine, and it must have gotten jealous because it is running ... as ... slowly ... as ... molasses ... in ... January ... today.

Maybe it just needs another cup of coffee?

Nope, that'd be this mama who needs another cup of coffee.

This machine is gonna get Windows 7 reinstalled and all the drivers updated by my personal Geek Squad this weekend. And then we can all celebrate its restoration to good health.

Oh, the joys of owning PCs and being married to a PC tech., no?

Halo: Taking Over the World

[One cell phone and Atari console at a time ...]

In this week's [or maybe just today's?] edition of "news Stephanie notices now only because she's married to a geek", I saw an article from TechCrunch about Microsoft's answer to Siri.

I know we all want some sort of personal assistant who knows what we need, when we need it, and can get it for us. Heck, if I had someone who could bring me coffee and do my paperwork and clean my house while I just played with Little Guy all day, that would be fantastic. And I know how hard it is to find a good assistant - I've actually worked as an admin assistant on several occasions, once for an executive director. [Do you know how hard it is to stay one step ahead of a boss who we all joked had more energy than the Energizer Bunny?!]

For some of us unfortunate souls, the closest we get to having a personal assistant is being good friends with apps like Remember the Milk, Evernote and Google Calender. [God bless those developers!]

Apparently, there are some people want a pseudo-friend who will organize their lives and talk to them, too, even if it's their OS wearing those shoes [wasn't there a movie nominated for an Oscar this year about that?].

Video gamers, say goodbye to Siri. Your new best friend [as long as you like Windows Mobile] is now Cortona.

Oh wait, she already was, wasn't she? For all those years you played Halo? [Or still play Halo?] 

Yeah, she's that creepy AI that helps you with the crazy amount of information you have to store whilst you're beating the bad guys.

Um, methinks I already have enough video games in my life without having my phone talk to me like a character from a giant gaming franchise that I'm pretty sure Mr. Dude could play through while blindfolded.

Thanks anyways, Microsoft. I'm sure it's the thought that counts.

In last week's edition of "news the family only pays attention to because they have a geek for a son", Mr. Dude's dad dropped off a photocopied article from the Smithsonian magazine. [Yes, he can be old-school like that. Photocopiers do still exist, people!]

The Scrabble rule in Mr. Dude's family is that if you can use it in a sentence, it's a legit word.

So now, thanks to someone who wanted to "demake" Halo by cramming it all into just 4KB of memory on an Atari 2600, I have a new word to use and hopefully score triple word points on. If only I could get Mr. Dude to play a game of Scrabble without taking 10 minutes for each turn ...

There. Now don't you feel so much more informed about the important events of the day?